Imagine growing up in a society where men are taught to swallow pain, where every tear is a sign of weakness, and where silence becomes the only acceptable response to suffering. For many boys who later become men, this is not just a lesson. It becomes a lifelong expectation. Many societies teach boys and men to “be strong,” not show weakness, and carry burdens silently. This may particularly make it difficult on the part of men to report or even admit that they are victims of abuse. Nevertheless, research reveal that the men are victims although in many cases their plight is concealed.
A survey conducted in Germany indicated that 6.2% of all cases of intimate partner violence (IPV) studied over 11 years were male victims– most of the ones harmed by their current partners at home.
In Kenya, Kisumu slums, one study conducted recently revealed that out of 398 men surveyed, 76.1% reported being the victim of intimate partner violence with 12.2% reporting physical, 16.5% sexual, 47.5% emotional, and 23.8% economic violence.
Regardless of this evidence, the support services are limited and the stigmas persist: numerous men do not report the abuse, being afraid of the shame, lack of belief, or being told that they should “be strong.”
Giving a blind eye to the plight of men does not improve equality. Speaking out, seeking help, and believing the survivors is the real strength when it comes to survivors regardless of genders. Our breaking of the silence allows us to create space in which we can heal and make communities safer to all.